Sion Goff
We all are familiar with the traditional relationships where a male figure is the ‘responsible,’ ‘dominant,’ or ‘decision maker’ in the relation.
But, do you know these gender roles can be switched? Yes. We are talking about a female-led relationship or FLR. They do exist!
Have you ever heard about this relation type? Well, you are about to.
This guide will help someone looking to find ideas, tips, and general rules on establishing an FLR or making it work without feeling the societal pressure.
So, is it better to be a female-dominant couple?
Are there any negatives involved? Is there any way a new or old woman-dominated relationship can go wrong for males or females?
Let’s find everything related to female-led relationships (FLR)!
Female Led Relationship
FLR or female led relationship is a blanket term that covers different levels of a female dominated relationship.
In general, when a traditional couple swaps dynamics roles, it becomes an FLR.
The woman acts as the decision-maker and responsible authority in the relation. On the other hand, the male takes the submissive role.
It breaks the stereotypes of being in a dominant male relationship, whether in a marriage, friendship, engagement, or a simple courtship.
But what is the actual meaning of a female led relationship?
FLR Meaning
Before understanding what is a female led relationship, let’s clear one thing.
It is not entirely related to kink culture or any dark meanings we see all over the web.
Yes! It does involve low to intense interactions, but it depends on the understanding of both people.
So, the basic FLR meaning is that the female gets to be in charge of all the important things, decisions, and matters.
Whereas the man remains at home, does typical house chores, raises children, and takes the relation’s submissive role.
Is it any different from the typical male-led relationship? Let’s find out.
Comparison: Similarities & Differences of Male Led Relationship & Female Led Relationship
If we take a general approach, the basic similarity in both relations is that one person is chosen as a dominant and responsible authority.
Which automatically makes the other person submissive and less authoritative.
So, what’s the difference? In a dominant male relationship, it is given that the man gets to have the upper hand.
However, in a female led relationship, both partners get to decide whether they want to be an FLR couple or not.
Yes! the male gets a chance to choose if he is willing and wants to be controlled and led by a woman, which we don’t usually see in a typical male-led relationship.
In a typical dominant male relationship, he is the bread winner and solely responsible for the family’s financial support.
However, in a female led relationship, both genders have an equal opportunity to take leads in financial support, chores, social activities, etc.
They both can freely express their feelings.
Make sure to understand, in FLR gender roles aren’t entirely swapped but changed a little to make decision-making transparent by involving both partners.
This is a major reason why females prefer to be in an FLR as it gives them a sense of freedom, authority, power, self-worth, and confidence boost.
Now, the question arises why a male would want to be in such a woman-dominated relationship?
Because a female led relationship satisfies the man’s true nature, he finally gets to be free of the financial pressure and household responsibilities.
We have discussed all the reasons later in our guide. Now, let’s discuss why a male would want to be in a female led relationship.
Why Males Seek Out an FLR?
When we hear about a man looking for a strong and confident woman, the first thing that pops into our mind is, “Why is a controlling male seeking an authoritative female?” Right?
It’s normal to think like that as we all are used to seeing men’s being the dominant ones in a relationship.
Well, a male can prefer to be in a female-led relationship due to the following advantages:
- He gets freedom and relief from monetary responsibilities, the pressure to make crucial decisions, and be responsible for them all the time
- They are treated equally in a relationship and are no longer accountable to support the family 100%
- He can freely express and communicate what he thinks and don’t need to suppress his submissive nature
- He can be vulnerable! Yes! He can finally break the social norm that a man is always controlling, dominant, and strong. In an FLR, he gets to show his emotions.
Enough with the theoretical benefits and talks on why a man prefers an FLR or what benefits he will get from it.
Everything may even seem baseless and imaginary for a beginner who’s deciding whether this type of relationship is suitable for him or her.
To better understand, let’s observe some real-life statistics in our next section to prove that there are several positive reasons why a female led relationship is getting popular.
Statistics & Real Survey of Female Led Relationship Couples
FLR relationship is not a new term but is only getting popular in the U.S. after some gender equality supporters and feminists decided to break the gender norms and social hierarchies.
Since then, Americans have been more open-minded to this type of relationship.
Even men on dating websites have started to add ‘looking for strong women’ or ‘Seeking an Authoritative Female’ to their profiles.
According to a survey’s statistics, 65% of young women have been in female-led marriages before, out of which more than 70% of FLR marriages lasted for more than 6 years.
In general, 70% of the young women have an FLR or show interest in getting one.
8 out of 10 couples stated that they were extremely happy and satisfied with the division of powers and roles.
Before proceeding to know more FLR benefits for man and women, let’s watch a surveyal video on female led relationship couples:
Here are the other reasons for the popularity of female led relationship:
- Eliminates the power struggles: Both partners mutually decide who will be the controlling, dominant, and responsible authority
- Allows men to express their submissive side: They no longer need to act all macho and be accountable for all the family needs
- Boost self-confidence and self-worth: Alpha females and submissive males get to show their true nature
- Makes the bonding stronger: Lessens the arguments as the female shares her feelings without hesitation
Benefits a Female Can Get from an FLR
Although one can clearly think of all the possible advantages a female led relationship can have for a woman in a mainstream society.
Still, we have enlisted some of the primary benefits below:
- A woman can focus on her career as she can divide chores and other home responsibilities with her partner
- She feels respected and equally involved in maintaining and progressing the relationship
- She can help him get rid of the bad habits and activities as a female led relationship gives the woman power and lead over the man
- A woman feels safe being in an FLR as she gets to have an equal or more share in every matter
- She can finally feel her worth which brings a positive change in her life, confidence, and personality
All these benefits, division of roles, chores, and responsibilities depend on the female relationship levels your relation is currently in.
So, what are these stages? Let’s find out!
How Can You Get into a Female Led Relationship?
Starting a female led relationship is similar to any other relationship type.
According to the real FLR survey, half of the couples didn’t even know a woman-dominated relationship exists, and 3 out of 4 experienced it for the first time.
Yet, more than 85% of couples had a healthy and successful FLR marriage or dating life.
So, how can you take the initiative and come into such a unique type of relation?
- Communicate with your partner and share your opinion about an FLR
- Ask their consent whether would they be comfortable being in one or not
- After the mutual agreement, before jumping right into it, first, gather every information about it and try to understand what it is and what it means to be in one
- Finally, talk it out with your lover, boyfriend, or spouse which female led relationship level they want to start with
Pro-Tip: Always try to take it slow right from the start to avoid any discomfort and arguments in the future
So, how can you know which FLR relationship level will work best for you? Find it in our next section!
Find the Perfect Female Led Relationship Level for Your Couple
Indeed, all the ranges, levels, and types of female lead relationships involve the dominant woman.
But, to what extent are their roles superior to the submissive man depend on their FLR relationship level and intensity.
You may find different information worldwide like ‘it’s the best relation a woman can get into’ or ‘a man get to enjoy the benefits too.’
But it’s also true that a female led relationship is not for everyone.
Yes, so to make it a better understanding for both genders, FLR is generally divided into four types.
If you think of getting into an FLR, first know which level you would feel comfortable in or, if you are in a female led relationship, know your exact level and make your harmony even better.
Let’s get to know all of them:
1. Level-1 FLR
A mild or lower female led relationship is more of a mutual understanding between the man and woman.
The female’s imposing role is a lot less, and often, she needs the male’s permission to take certain decisions in the relationship.
Sometimes, she has the freedom to give her input, and sometimes, she doesn’t. To what extent she can be the alpha really depends on the man.
In lower FLR relationship levels, the female doesn’t think of herself as the dominant and the male to be the submissive.
Instead, she knows, to make a decision, the opinion of both parties should match. They both exchange meaningful gifts on special days like birthdays, valentine’s, or anniversaries without having to feel superior to each other.
Here is a basic narrative that a man or woman in a mild female led relationship level can have:
Male perspective: He believes in gender equality and wants to have an understanding relationship with his partner where he can be helpful and cooperative to lead her on the right track.
Female Perspective: She likes to get pampered with captivating gifts but doesn’t want to commit to the idea of controlling someone.
Tip For Females: If a wife wants to lead an FLR and influence her husband, she can get plenty of gifts for him, so he can drool over her more than ever.
FLR Level-1 Rules:
- Mutual agreement on dividing responsibilities, roles, and work
- In some situations, the male is dominant. While, in others, female get to take the final decision
Tips to Make It Work:
- To avoid any discomfort, communicate to decide and follow the defined rules
- Be honest and transparent about your needs and goals
- Exchange gifts to feel other special and important
Pro-Tip: Check gifts for a woman who has everything or see presents for an impossible man who is too picky to shop.
Make sure you leave no stones unturned to make each other happy!
2. Level-2 FLR
As the level increases, the dominant personality of the female also gets more prominent in the relationship.
Still, in a moderate FLR relationship level, the woman sets some boundaries for herself to take the lead over the man.
This is the FLR type, in which one can observe a boost in the woman’s self-confidence and self-worth as she clearly knows she has the upper hand in some matters.
It could be the perfect level to be in a female led relationship for someone who wants to see if this type of relationship is ideal for them.
What could the reason be? The male can enjoy being dominant, and at the same time, he can give a sense of pleasure and self-assurance to the female.
Male Perspective: The man has a shy or submissive nature and enjoys being controlled by his partner. Still, in some matters, he wants to be in charge.
Female Perspective: She believes in a ‘give and take’ relationship. The female wants to make her partner happy but also desires some benefits in return.
FLR Level-2 Rules:
- Female is the dominant decision-maker in certain matters
- The boundary is set on how far a woman can go to use her power
- Man is free to say his opinion and express his feeling
Tips to Make It Work:
- Share your thoughts, ideas, and feelings before the decision has been made
- Respect the set boundaries and talk it out if one partner is not happy
- Be comfortable with each other and don’t listen to what other peoples have to say
Here, check some love sayings for her or him that can be sent by a lover boy or girl to remember why they agreed for an FLR.
3. Level-3 FLR
This is the FLR level where it is finally defined that it is a female led relationship which implies that the woman is the dominant or the authority figure.
To simply put, it is the opposite of a traditional male-led relationship.
The female takes major responsibilities of the dominant like allowance, income, and decision-making.
In contrast, the male acts more like a submissive lady responsible for doing house chores, raising kids, and making the dominant happy.
In short, at a defined or formal FLR level, there is a clear dividing line between submissive male and dominant female.
Male Perspective: He enjoys being led on by the alpha female. He likes to wait for his partner, receive compliments, make the woman happy, and be the good obedient male he is.
Female Perspective: She likes to take control of the couple’s future and her partner’s well-being.
FLR Level-3 Rules:
- Traditional roles are swapped: male takes responsibility to do house chores, raising children
- The female is the dominant partner who has to earn and make money
- Women get to take the crucial decision for man, as individuals and as a couple
- The man agrees to give the lead to the lady in all the matters
Tips to Make It Work:
- Review how the relationship is going and if both man and women are satisfied and happy with the reverse roles
- Remember, FLR is not about abusing power but making both partners happy
- Take notice if the female is acting more dominant and less like your lover, wife, or girlfriend
4. Level-4 FLR
This female-led relationship is considered less healthy than other levels where a female is dominant to some extent.
An extreme FLR relationship is more like a connection between a queen and his slave.
The female controls every aspect of the male, be it his free time, activities, hobbies, personal life, or financial matters.
To which the male shows obedience and is happy and satisfied with the attention he gets from his partner.
The extreme female led relationships are considered too intense and serious.
Still, some males like to be treated with intensity, power, and force by their partners. This unusual behavior satisfies the submissive, weak, and shy nature of the male.
Male Perspective: The male may be too in love or has a strong submissive nature that he doesn’t feel like the lady is controlling him. He often seems like someone who’s hypnotized.
Female Perspective: She has a controlling nature and desire for power. Instead of searching for a perfect man, she wants to use her powerful desire to mold an ordinary man into someone she likes.
FLR Level-4 Rules:
- The female has the upper hand in all matters
- The woman is the one who makes choices for man’s financial, social, and other activities
- Male thinks of him as submissive and someone who is on the lesser grounds than the lady
Tips to Make It Work:
- Regular reviewing of the roles and responsibilities, i.e., nothing is too abusive or forceful
- Don’t forget the base of your relationship: Love
How Do You Establish a Female Led Relationship?
To make an FLR relationship rock, male and female first need to establish some female led relationship rules to follow at each level.
And, even before that, they need to communicate and agree to get involved in such a relationship.
So, the best time to establish a female led relationship is right at the start of your relationship.
Yes! Discuss it with your partner at the initial stages of dating or before getting married.
To establish a good FLR, it is a must that both partners are willing to be a woman-dominated couple.
We have enlisted some of the female led relationship rules that are a must to make this type of connection work:
- The woman is responsible for earning money, dividing chores, and making life decisions for the couple’s future
- Male does majority of the house chores like cleaning, cooking, and washing
- The man trusts the female to make choices for him like how he will spend his free time, the social gatherings he can attend, etc.
- The woman has the power to control the bad habits of the male
What Qualities Should a Man Have to Get Into an FLR?
If a woman wants to have a female led relationship, she needs to look for a man that will agree to be the submissive one. But is it that easy?
As we all know, most men have stronger masculine energy.
Moreover, it is a traditional norm that males are supposed to be the dominant partner in a relation, making it even more difficult.
So, what qualities should you look for in a man if you want to have an FLR marriage or courtship?
Here, we have mentioned some of the traits for you:
1. Open Mindset: Want to Try New Things
A man who loves to try new things than the standard and normal ones would be a perfect partner in a female led relationship. For instance, a male who has a thirst for learning and trying new things about different relationships.
Or the one who doesn’t mind if he’s being controlled in some matters by the female and takes it as a unique experience.
2. Beta Male: Tired of Being Responsible
A male who considers himself more like a beta male than the alpha, i.e., he doesn’t believe in the dominant male culture where only he’s responsible for taking care of the family, earning money, and making crucial decisions.
A man with such qualities will be happy and satisfied in a female-led marriage.
3. Independent: Takes No Pressure from Society
This is the vital trait you need to look for in a man as society’s pressure and people’s judgment are some of the things that can badly affect female-led marriages or FLR dating couples.
The male figure should be someone with a strong opinion who’s not easily affected by society’s pressure or other people’s judgment.
For instance, he knows what kind of relationship he’s getting himself into and won’t feel confused, unhappy, or dissatisfied.
4. Emotionally Stable: No Insecurities or Suppressed Feelings
An insecure man can pin down even a strong, powerful man too, so, nay nay! He won’t be a good option for any female led relationship.
So, now that you know the basic qualities you need to look for in a man.
And, suppose you have found him already, what’s next?
When is the best time to establish an FLR? After months of dating or marriage?
Well, the best way to establish a female led relationship is in the earlier stages of dating and before your marriage. Yes!
A women-led relationship can only work if both partners talk about it before starting their official relation.
The man needs to support the woman’s femineity, emotional health, and life goals.
At the same time, the lady will assure that male is relaxed, satisfied, and happy in the relationship too.
The best way to establish a healthy female-dominated relationship is balancing the roles, responsibilities, and desires of the dominant and submissive partner.
To understand wife-led relations even better, both partners can join FLR support groups, coaching sessions, read relevant books like love and obey: series, or even watch podcasts online.
Before moving further, let’s watch a podcast interview of a real-life female-led relationship couple: Joanne & Brian.
Get to know how they are managing to be happy, contented, and free of all social pressure and judgments:
Can a Female Led Relationship Work?
Yes! It can work as well as any other normal relationship.
According to a couple’s survey, more than 80% of the FLR couples said they were satisfied with the division of roles.
In fact, 91% of the males were happy to be controlled and doing girly house chores.
But, to make a stronger bond, both genders need to put some effort and thought into making their relationship work for the better. Here are some tips for you:
- Maintain the balance between the dominant and submissive roles
- Have open communication, i.e., allow both partners to express their goals and opinions freely
- Review the progress and problems of the relation regularly
- Always exchange gifts, compliments, or romantic sayings to keep the loving spirit alive
- Develop a mutual understanding and set terms and rules that work for both people
- Don’t tolerate any abuse as FLR is not a battle of power
How to Deal with People Stares, Judgment, & Societal Pressure?
The first and foremost tip is to Ignore the societal pressure and people’s judgment.
Yes, it can be hard for beginners, but it is the only way you can feel contented in your female led relationship.
Secondly, you should always make efforts to keep the ‘love’ alive in your couple, whether it be an FLR, an equal relationship, or even a male-led relationship.
Lastly, prepare yourself that this type of relationship is not typical or traditional.
We all are used to seeing in our daily lives where only females are responsible for the house duties and males for financial support.
Besides that, the only thing that matters in your relationship is you and your partner’s happiness. Rest is just mere talk and not your problem at all.
We have been discussing the rules, responsibilities, FLR relationship levels, and tips on making things work, but still, is there any way a woman-dominated relationship can go wrong.
What is the negative side of FLR relations? Yes! Like any other bonding, a female led relationship has its drawbacks too.
Let’s find out in the next section.
How Can a Female Dominated Relationship Go Wrong?
You have studied every information about the rules, FLR levels, tips, and ideas on how a female led relationship can benefit males and males.
But is it possible that it still can be difficult for some couples to establish a healthy female led relationship despite knowing everything?
- One of the partners is no longer feeling happy and satisfied with all the duties they are assigned
- Male or female have failed to maintain a balance between power and abuse of power
- Only one person is contributing to progress the relationship level, which can make him or her irritated and frustrated
- There’s no mutual respect in the relation anymore
- One partner is forceful in some matters, which makes the other feel low
- Both people don’t feel love for each other as the relationship is progressing
Drawbacks of FLR
As we explained at the start, a female-dominated relationship is not for everyone.
Like any other type of relationship, it has some challenges, issues, and drawbacks that can sometimes be quite tricky:
- Social norms and public opinion can affect a satisfied and happy FLR relation for beginners
- A submissive man may lose interest in being controlled at any level
- The dominant female may become too comfortable in women dominated relation and eventually skip considering the feelings or opinions of male
- Extreme FLR level is so intense that it is often regarded as unhealthy for both people
- Dominant and submissive indulge too much in swapping their traditional roles that they forget the love they had for each other
- Female may start to use their leading power negatively to control the mind and body of their partner
Conclusion: Is Female Led Relationship a Good Option?
In any relationship, whether male-led, female-led, or other unique relations, the key to balance and happiness is open communication and mutual understanding.
Sure, the dominant male is a traditional norm, but some men still exist that like to lay low and step down from all the societal pressure, judgment, and financial responsibilities.
Yes! And such masculine personalities like to try female led relationships willingly.
Why? Because they get to rest, stay at home, and don’t have to worry about earning and supporting the family.
So, Yes! Such men can try a mild FLR if they don’t want to jump right into a woman-dominant relationship or try for moderate FLR where they can still lead in some matters.
However, statistics and surveys show that both males and females prefer defined FLR levels and, in some cases, chose the extreme type.
Bottom Line
To sum it up, a female led relationship gives equality, freedom, happiness, satisfaction, and mutual connection depending on the type of level you choose.
Lastly, what do you think about this type of relationship? Share your thoughts with us!
For more such interesting topics, make sure to check Inspire Uplift Blog Category.